Mariana Ramirez | Contributing Writer

One day on my way to the cafeteria with a friend, we found ourselves in a somewhat uncomfortable spot. Just after entering the forum, we met not one but two couples walking ahead of us hand-in-hand, presumably to the same destination.

It must have been a somewhat comical scene to the outsider. We, the loners, looked like we were stalking them. It wasn’t long, however, before the jokester inside me made a Pitch Perfect-inspired quip: “I have a feeling we should hold hands now…”

Needless to say, we giggled our way out of awkwardness and gained a couple of back glances from our unintentional prey.

On a more serious note…

Our little incident wasn’t out of the ordinary. On a typical day on campus, it’s easy to spot hand-holding couples looking quite at ease with one another.

It’s cute. Sometimes their affection looks genuinely sincere.

Quite honestly, I have no objection to this form of PDA. Even the exchange of a quick peck is okay by me (so long as it doesn’t go beyond that).

But what about the singleton “loners” like my friend and me?

Speaking for myself, I can’t deny that I haven’t longed to have that sort of connection with someone. In fact, there was a point in my life—probably in high school when such things seemed to matter—when I would have deemed my single status as a sign that something was wrong with me, an indication that I had failed in some way.

Things changed once I came to college, though. I surrounded myself with people holding similar goals and values. I gained self-confidence. I matured. And somewhere along the way, I made the choice not to get involved in a relationship.

As of now, I’m quite content with being single. I get to be “selfish” and care for myself and not for someone else’s conception of me. I get to focus on becoming the person I want to be. I get to follow my dreams without having to make any major compromises.

The way I see it, being in a relationship requires a commitment that I’m neither willing nor able to grant at the moment. My studies are the main factor behind this conviction as they’ve always been my number one priority (after family, of course).

My choice is my choice, though it has yet to spare me from having to answer the same awkward question at the family Christmas: “So, do you have a boyfriend?” Their anticipation for my response has even changed the nature of this question to: “So, do you have a boyfriend yet?”

Ouch, right?

Still, will my priorities change? Probably not. Education and family will probably always be at the top. However, I do think I’ll become more flexible once Mr. Right shows up.

Until then, I’ll hold on to that lovely Marilyn Monroe quote (which applies to me in more ways than I care to admit): “I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”

Graphic by Grace Bodey