Poopetrator Exposes Crappy Truth 

Ella+Wiebusch
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Poopetrator Exposes Crappy Truth 

Ella Wiebusch

Ella Wiebusch

Ella Wiebusch

Ella Wiebusch

Hunter Vasey, Contributing Writer

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The Poopetrator has been terrorizing the residents of PierceWhite for almost two months now. It started as rumors of someone making messes in the bathrooms, but soon it became clear that these were targeted attacks. These atrocities are clearly the work of a criminal mastermind, possibly even a group of people. We are all living in fear. If I walk into the bathroom, am I going to find a clogged toilet, feces on the wall, or even worse, step into a pile of poop? 

Not only are they harassing the residents of PierceWhite, but they’re making the custodians jobs much harder. To me, that’s the worst part about these incidents, because the custodians of PierceWhite are some of the nicest and hardest working people I’ve ever met, and they definitely don’t deserve this. I’m not sure if the Poopetrator’s goal is to make some sort of statement, or if he simply enjoys making other people’s life hell. Either way, they obviously have some deep seeded issues that they need to work out at home.

Though the Poopetrator is clearly the villain of this situation, I feel as though they expose a deeper problem within the administration of BVU. When the issues with the bathrooms started, Resident Life’s response was to revoke toilet paper privileges from all of the boys bathrooms in Pierce. I’m not sure what the thought process was on this decision, but it was questionable at best. It did nothing to discourage the Poopetrator––in fact it made the attacks spread to other floors. The only thing this decision did succeed in was punishing the mostly innocent residents of Pierce. 

When Res Life did finally take action on the matter, it was to notify everyone of the situation, and announce that we would all be paying $300 a month unless the Poopetrator came forward. After this news, many residents of PierceWhite took matters into their own hands. It started with monitoring who entered and exited the bathrooms on each floor, but soon groups of residents patrolling the halls armed with baseball bats. I don’t believe the situation would have escalated in this way if Res Life had handled it better and discovered who the Poopetrator was earlier. 

In my opinion, camera surveillance in the dorms is long overdue, and already standard for many other universities across the country. Not only would cameras have prevented the Poopetrator situation from getting as bad as it did, but they would just generally make life safer for students at BVU. I just hope that Res Life gets a better hold on the situation before anyone else has to pay for it. And if the Poopetrator(s) is reading this, just know that if you don’t turn yourself in, you will be caught eventually, and you will atone for your crimes.